Esprit de l'escalier

I found my calculator. *sigh of relief* Praise the LORD.

Friday: Spending evening with Matt. Making cookies together for his mom for valentine’s day. Then a movie and games.

Saturday: Work 11-2. Alex is taking me to see King Lear at the theatre. Dinner is also involved then Cafe Ladro after.

Sunday: Watching several episodes of Smallville with Greg (RHMC guy – you may remember him from previous ‘waylongago’ posts). He’s making dinner and I’m providing cookies. The party will be at my place. Last time it was at his place.

Also, last night Alex came with me to look at stars for my astronomy project. It was like, 11 p.m. when he came over. Roommate was in bed already. I was in a ‘I’m-so-tired-I’m-goofy-silly’ mode. (which leaves great potential for embarrassment later on). It was fun, I found several necessary constellations and we walked and talked for a long time. Then we came back to my place and had hot cider and did a bit more homework. Before we know it, he has his head against my shoulder and I’m scratching his head (you know the head scratch, right? yea…a huge weakness of every guy) and I asked him to tell me a story. He told me this really good story that he just made up off the top of his head. It was awesome. Anyhow, it was like 2:30 a.m. by the time he left. I’m proud to say that I held strong to my rules of ‘taking-it-slow-because-he’s-a-freshman’ and we’re still at the side hug stage. Yay me! There were several opportunities to share a kiss, but the good LORD was with me and helped me resist. He smells soooo good! It’s hard! Anyhow, just thought I’d update you on that.

In other news. Josh (airforce guy) called me from Texas and we chatted a while. He’s doing good. I can honestly say that it was really nice to talk to him. I’d forgotten how much he makes me laugh and how refreshing it is to hear him talk with passion about the LORD’s work in his life. It’s so uplifting. By the end of the conversation he was asking if it would be okay if he called a bit more often. I told him that I can’t guarantee that I’ll be around to receive his calls, but he can call me if he needs to talk. So that’s that. I’m not sure he’ll be calling any more often than before.

If you check out Matt’s lj (xmosherkidx), you’ll see where we’re at. The part in his last entry where he talks about how two girls called that he didn’t want to be his girl friend, and the one that he does didn’t call back – that’s me. I didn’t have a chance to call him back. I feel so bad though…I told him that I wasn’t in a position to have a boyfriend and so my answer had to be no. He said he understood and we’d still date as friends. So we’ll see how that goes.

If I had to choose at this point, I’d say the freshman is in the lead. But I’m not choosing. I’m just going by who smells, dresses and loves Jesus the best. haha. I’m a brat…don’t mind me. 🙂

I have come to a conclusion that the man I’m meant to be with will have these two qualities (among other important characteristics like being a Christian and such).
Several of you know exactly what I’m talking about. For those that don’t…I’m sorry. That’s a bummer for you.
Also, I think I’m going to write a book about these qualities. (Well, at least a small and reasonably eloquent essay.) Because I think they are very important. Perhaps I’ll elaborate further sometime soon.
Ok, well those are my thoughts for now. Have a nice evening. If you get a chance, go outside and take a look at the stars…they are beautiful tonight.

P.S.- I’ve lost my new calculator. This makes me sad and frustrated. We (the calculator and I) were just coming to a point of mutual understanding about how we should work together…and now…*sniffle*…he’s gone!
If you have seen a Sharp calculator that seems to be missing an owner…please contact me. Thank you.

Loreanne…since I can’t comment on your ‘other’ journal…I’ll tell you through my own. I loved your halo poem. It really speaks to me and puts into words feelings I’ve experienced many times. Thank you for sharing it with me.

An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy. “It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves. One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.”

“The other is good. He is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.”

“This same fight is going on inside you,” he said to his grandson. “And inside every other person, too.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee replied, “The one you feed.”

When the sun comes out…I walk slower.
I like the sun.

The moon came out for a few minutes last night. It was beautiful. I sat up and watched it for a while…almost as great as watching a lava lamp, only, not as much movement.
There are a gazillion things I should be doing right now…but I really truely just don’t feel like…grocery shopping, chasing people down for quotes, working on my articles, writing three huge papers, cleaning, etc etc etc. Do you ever feel like just not doing something? Or a bunch of things?
I think I’m going to take this time right now to just sit, do some stretches and pray for a while. I think those are all healthy things…so obviously I’m not procrastinating, I’m being healthy, right? Sure.
In other news, I’m getting overwhelmed with the idea of my intended career as a journalist. The more and more I investigate into it…the more intimidated I get. Those people are so smart and assertive and more smart! It’s like they have this amazing instinct to know where all the news is. I can hardly find good news on campus that’s worthy to print. LORD help me.
P.S. Happy almost Valentine’s Day! You are all loved.

The book you ordered, The 2004 World Almanac of Fart Jokes, has arrived. It will be held for you at the front desk (not the information desk for the love of God!) until 2:48 p.m. Then it will explode, killing our cashiers instantly.

Adina Shewfelt
Store Manager B&N Store #389
Seattle Pacific University Bookstore

***My bookstore has a wonderful sense of humor. Just so you know, I actually ordered The 2004 World Almanac. And my class today gets out at 2:40p.m. – according to this email, this gives me 8 minutes to get my book, despite the fact that my shift at the Bookstore starts at 3 p.m. Hmmm, bummer for me.

In other news, I went to pick up a few things downtown today. There weren’t any curbside spaces, so I was forced to the parking garage. I park, get my stuff, get back to my car and pull up to the cashier stand. Hand the lady my card, her face is expressionless, she continues to talk monotone on the phone. I say with a sigh as I look at my $4 total, “I was only here for about 10 minutes.” *my eyes pleading for a break* She responds, still expressionless, “12, you were here 12 minutes.” And she hands me back my Visa card (because I had no cash – it figures). The $4 toll for ’12’ minutes wouldn’t have hurt so much had I at least received a pity smile – a drop of fake sympathy at least. What a cold cold world.

Life…*sigh*…what is life? A word to describe my life right now would be…hmmm…complex. I’d say that’s a fair description. What is making my life complex? Decisions, decisions and more decisions. I hate decisions. A lot of times I wish I could just not make a choice and let the issue just wilt away. But as they say…to not make a decision, is making a decision.
Today I was confronted by our bookstore managers asking if I had come to any conclusions about the management position they offered me last quarter. I don’t have to make the decision now, they said, but I do need to at least be thinking about it. Then there is the news editor position with The Falcon…that’s a huge one. And it’s in my vocation of choice. Can I do both? I hope so. But in addition to those, there is the internship with Response magazine. I’m not even sure if I have the position yet, but it’s there. Also I got a letter from Student Ministries asking me to try out for the SMC position. What I want to know is who recommended me? Do they even know me? haha. I’m not sure where that may lead. Opportunity abounds…what to do.
Social life choices are starting to pile up on me. Without going into it too deeply, let me just say these ones are harder than my career choices because there are more options. I’m leaving this category for God to decide, this is way beyond me.

Verse for the moment: Isa. 48:17
“This is what the Lord says- your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you what is best for you, who directs you in the way you should go.”

Verses for the month: James 4:13-17
*look it up*