Email from the Bookstore – (received today)

The book you ordered, The 2004 World Almanac of Fart Jokes, has arrived. It will be held for you at the front desk (not the information desk for the love of God!) until 2:48 p.m. Then it will explode, killing our cashiers instantly.

Adina Shewfelt
Store Manager B&N Store #389
Seattle Pacific University Bookstore

***My bookstore has a wonderful sense of humor. Just so you know, I actually ordered The 2004 World Almanac. And my class today gets out at 2:40p.m. – according to this email, this gives me 8 minutes to get my book, despite the fact that my shift at the Bookstore starts at 3 p.m. Hmmm, bummer for me.

In other news, I went to pick up a few things downtown today. There weren’t any curbside spaces, so I was forced to the parking garage. I park, get my stuff, get back to my car and pull up to the cashier stand. Hand the lady my card, her face is expressionless, she continues to talk monotone on the phone. I say with a sigh as I look at my $4 total, “I was only here for about 10 minutes.” *my eyes pleading for a break* She responds, still expressionless, “12, you were here 12 minutes.” And she hands me back my Visa card (because I had no cash – it figures). The $4 toll for ’12’ minutes wouldn’t have hurt so much had I at least received a pity smile – a drop of fake sympathy at least. What a cold cold world.

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