Esprit de l'escalier

My roommate and I were at Starbuckies Sunday, attempting (like most college students) to study and look cool at the same time. Absorbed in my Astronomy Today textbook, sections 2.2-2.4, I had not noticed that the person occupying the armchair next to me had changed…how many times this transition took place…I’m not sure. But I did notice when a 30 something-year-old man in tawny colored bowling shoes and a playschool red fleece sat next to me by the fireplace. I noticed because I could feel him looking at me.

[…]

You are the classy pin-up! You are everything
sophisticated and refined about the entire era.
You exude class and dignity.

What Type Of Retro Gal Are You?
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Sometimes I wish God would answer me faster. I mean honestly…I’ve been praying about this one thing for like…since before winter break (when the situation was raised) and I still don’t have an answer. God shouldn’t have made me such an impatient person if He was going to take so long in answering me. Gee wiz.

I have a lot to do still. But on the bright side, I just spent the last two hours getting myself organized…finally. I’m feeling better for it.

My roommate is going to be gone on a retreat this weekend…woohoo! Party time for me!

Most excitingly…my women’s Bible study is officially on the calendar! I’m so excited to see where the good LORD takes it. Yay!!!

Also, one other decision I need to make is who I’m going to write a letter to this month. I did make that goal to write one eloquent letter a month at least. Hmm, who should it be?

Ok, I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted anything of substance and this post…isn’t gonna change that. I just got back from watching a movie with Brigette, Dave and Sarah. Animal House…apparently it’s the mother of all college movies? It was funny, but I guess I just wasn’t in the mood. Whatever. Right now, this very moment, besides work and class, my constructive level is like negative 23 on the constructivness scale. I have all these plans in my head of stuff I need to get going on…but I haven’t gotten anywhere! I need to pull myself together to get my women’s Bible study started…and I haven’t even organized my calendar yet! I have calls to make and letters to write, emails to respond to and compose, there’s so much I should have done by now! I haven’t even read everthing I’m supposed to have read for class. It’s the third day of classes and I’m already behind.
So much for working on my life virtues. I had actually tried Franklin’s virtues once. It only made me feel worse about my life. haha.

I watched You’ve Got Mail the other day, before I left back for school. I love that movie. I love the way they write their emails. I actually remember writing letters like that to friends, just last quarter. So eloquent and well thought out. The words role off your tongue and have so much meaning packed into each one chosen. Do other people my age still appreciate a well written letter? I often wonder if I were to find the time to sit down and write a letter that I poured hours of thought into…how many would write back with the same effort? How did they do it back in the day? When they didn’t have phone or emails? Their letters must have been so long…but then again, they didn’t do as much in a day as we do now. So they probably didn’t have as much to write about. Nevertheless, I think it’s a noble task to set for myself…to write at least one well thought out letter a week. Or perhaps, for starters, I should say one letter a month. It’s probably a more reasonable goal considering how much I already have on my plate.
Hmmm, I think I’ll go to bed now…the end.

Thought for the day: Is it worth putting your focus toward something even if you know you won’t be able to give it 100%? And even if you could give 100% to something…how do you know which?

I was talking to a friend about this today and I got some very wise advice:
“Don’t confuse your best with perfection.”

Wow. Good point.

So a few days ago (okay, more like a week or so ago) I took my grandma Christmas shopping and I discovered a new skill. I’m proud to say that I can handle a wheelchair like nobody’s business. But in the process, I’ve also discovered a wide range of wheelchair friendly and not-so-wheelchair friendly stores. To name a few anti-wheelchair stores in the mall: Brookstone was the worst and Hollister didn’t even have an entrance for wheelchairs! (Instead they have those steps in front of their store). Some okay stores were Bath & Body Works and of course, Macy’s and other big department stores. Barns & Noble was decent too. But I suppose the holiday crowds weren’t exactly helpful to the situation, but this was a few days before the last week for Christmas shopping. So there is no excuse! Anyhow, it was an eye opening experience.

More Christmas News

Fun times today. Got up early, went for a run in the rain. Came back, showered, went to Best Buy to pick up a few last things. Did laundry, ironed, cleaned the house. Then met up with my buddies Lance and Emily to go see LOTR: Return of the King. Way to end a series, eh? A lot of it is still sinking in. Then the three of us went to Borders and so Lance could get the soundtrack. When we were there, Lance was making his purchase and (naturally) I had wandered off and gotten sucked into the wonderful world of books. As I was resurfacing, I noticed I had lost track of my friends and I figured they were probably ready to leave. So I went searching and I saw them by the door. Lance pointed and said “there she is!” I thought to myself, “Awh, sweet, they were looking for me.” Then I saw a little hand off! Emily passed Lance some money and I was like, “whoa, what’s going on here?” And apparently they had placed a bet on who could find me first. Thus began the ongoing bets throughout the rest of the evening. We met up with some more friends at the Elephant Bar. That was fun. Then we met up again with more friends at Lance’s place to play with his new puppy and watch Pirates of the Carribean. Good stuff. Lots of pretty pirates. hehe. So now I’m gearing up for the rest of the week, it’s gonna be a doozy.

Oh, and I found out today that one of my good friends is 4 months pregnant. She’s been living with her bf. Oh dear. If he does anything stupid, I will hunt him down. I should call her. LORD be with her.

Goodnight.

You know what’s better than finding money when you’re doing laundry? Finding Christmas presents!!! Yay!
Apparently my daddy knew that the best place to hide something from someone is in the last place they’d ever look. For my mom, that ‘special place’ was the laundry bins. Haha.

Life in the world is a mixture of key life concepts. Many people spend their lives trying to boil life down to one all-encompassing concept of living. I have come to the conclusion that such boiling is impossible.
…
There is an irony laced through just about everything in this world. Respect is given to the material people who have wealth and possessions. There is an equal respect for the underdog or the unfortunate. We also praise and admire those who have gone from one level to the other; from unfortunate to wealthy. But at the same time some people have a strange pride in being able to say they have very little. People criticize others for materialism while they strive to achieve certain things themselves.
….
It is the diversity of living styles among people that make everyday new. But this factor also prevents any one ‘life-living concept’ from sticking. Is there any one thing that can apply all the time, to all people? Such absolutes are a rarity.
….
My thought? Life is simple – living it isn’t.

I was approached and carded (given a business card) by an “LA Talent” agent again yesterday in Barns and Noble. It’s the first time I’ve been scouted there. I always thought the agents just stuck to cruising the mall. Seriously, every few months I get approached. I’m wondering if God is trying to tell me something. Should I actually call back this time? Almost every agent that has given me a card tried either to book me on the spot or has written their home or cell phone number on the back.
It’s funny, this time the guy was trying to be clever and witty. I was looking for a particular book in the humor section when the guy came up and said to me “You want to tell jokes?” (or something like that). Then he rattles off something about being funny, pulls out a business card and writes his number on the back. I was about to turn and walk away while he was writing, but he stopped and handed me the card. I don’t remember what he actually said…probably the usual spiel about what he and his agency are about. Then he wrapped it all up with, “And that’s no joke!” (oh, that’s a good one! *dripping with sarcasm*)
He was still laughing about his clever line when I smiled nicely and walked away. It’s sort of funny now that I look back on it. I guess you had to be there.
Anyhow, I wonder if these places would pay enough to get me through the last few quarters of college. I know my parents could use the help. I dunno…I’m almost scared to consider it. That whole world has probably changed completely since I’ve last experienced it. Plus, I was in a different age bracket at that time. The adult side is obviously way more brutal. Could I survive? Would I be strong enough to hold a ministry to the people I’d work with? I probably wouldn’t make it very far anyway because of the standards I have (a.k.a. modesty). Or perhaps I’d be considered a unique commodity because of my rare morals? Nawh, I’m sure I wouldn’t be the only one.
There are so many beautiful girls out there. Plus, when you think about it…I’d probably just be another one of the ‘standard blond hair, blue eyed’ girls that people like to hate because they’re so prevalent (fake or otherwise). As much as I’d like to believe that I’d be different and could have an impact and change things…I can’t. I’m slowly coming off my idealist cloud and realizing that I could never be strong enough to influence the people in that world. It’s a sad reality to face. Well, actually, it’s more of a humbling reality than anything else.
I should know better by now that it’s a waste of time to even consider these possibilities. Shame on me.

Back in the real world. My friends Dan and Lana got engaged on Friday. It’s a very exciting time. They are a great couple. This makes five newly engaged couples since I’ve come home. There’s a lot to look forward to. Praise the LORD.