Writing Murder

With so many ways that a person can die, it’s a wonder that we aren’t all living in fear.

Is it weird that while writing a DIY article about mason jar chandeliers I couldn’t help but think about how this type of decorative piece could inflict death upon an unsuspecting victim? Perhaps while wiring there is a short circuit that sends a bout of electricity coursing through your body. Or maybe the fixture itself wasn’t installed properly inflicting blunt force trauma to the top of a passing pedestrian’s head? This line of thinking isn’t new for me. And just to clear this up now…no, I have never had any intention of murdering or killing anyone in any way. To tell the truth, I’m not sure that I’m unnecessarily morbid so much as just really afraid of things. I mean, I don’t feel like I go through life living in fear. Perhaps I have a overactive sense of mortality.  Anyone who knows me can tell you that there are really only two things I’m hyper vigilant about and that’s jay walking and the set of Cutco knives in our kitchen. The first is the result of all the obituaries I had to write my first year at the newspaper. The second is, well, in my mind completely obvious. They’re knives! I simply refuse to touch them unless absolutely necessary. Few objects are as scary as an over-sharp knife. I do, by the way, believe there is such a thing as a knife that is too sharp. If ever you are cut and it takes you a while to realize it…that instrument is too sharp. It’s simply common courtesy, if death is upon you, the least of your worries should be noticing it.

What’s worse is that of all the things in this world that have been expressly made for the purpose of killing, people seem to forget that knives fall in that category. All the fuss is poured over guns. The reason seems to be that knives serve many supposed ‘purposes’. Like slicing vegetables for soup or opening the plastic encasing a block of cheese. But when I think about it, it’s like putting inmates to work. Sure they can be useful…but would you let them be useful as a babysitter? To me, they are simply killing tools hiding behind a mask of utility. Don’t even get me started on letter openers or scissors! Weapons masquerading as office supplies.

Now I know you may be thinking to yourself, ‘Sarah, there are many good, wholesome, noble uses for a knife.’  Sure, sure, I’m not disagreeing with that point. Like surgeons need their scalpel to save lives, etc. And I’m not saying that the root of all evil is a blade. It is true that it is not the knife itself that kills, but the person who holds it. But consider for a moment accidents in the kitchen…

And with that, I must end this train of thought. I will admit this post went down a path I had not intended. Plus, all this talk of knives is giving me the creeps and I have to cook dinner soon.  I think what this all comes down to is the thought that everyday objects could be involved in ending someone’s life…something as inane as a beautiful light fixture or as obviously treacherous (but all too common) as an overly-sharp pairing knife.

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