Esprit de l'escalier

I did it. I miss him so much, but I know it was the right thing to do. He knows I feel horrible. And I almost wonder if he isn’t glad I feel bad. His voice didn’t match his words.

Then after he hung up on me the first time, he called back and said “Please don’t go.”
Lord be with me. It’s so hard! I told him that it wasn’t that easy. Then he hung up again.

He said he knew what I needed and he promised to be that for me. I can’t live on promises. He knows I still care for him. But I don’t know if that matters to him.

He said I was making a mistake. I’ll wait for him to show me I’m wrong.