Esprit de l'escalier

My professor e-mailed these to our class. Seeing as how I’m single and really have no intention of changing and that I really don’t have a desire to get to know any person of the male persuasion at a “meaningful level” (to determine if they’re “the one”) –I thought I’d post these for all the folks out there who are with someone and seeking to know them on a meaningful level. *cough*Loreanne*cough*Andrea*cough* So with that…I leave you to view the following at your leisure.

I came across these “Open-Ended Communication Questions” today and thought you might be interested. They are the kinds of questions you can ask someone you are dating that might help you get to know them at a meaningful level — the level that can help you determine whether they are “the one.” For what it’s worth, here you go …

Besides love, what one trait have you noticed in couples that have maintained a successful relationship for many years?

Looking back on your life, of what are you most proud?

Describe some personal habits that are important to you.

Describe an interest you have that you would truly hope your partner could share with you.

What is the one dream for your life you most look forward to having come true?

If you had three wishes, what would they be?

In general, how many nights a week do you go out for entertainment? What sorts of things do you like to do when you go out on the town?

During a typical week, what sort of physical activities do you enjoy?

How big is your extended family? What are the holidays like for you and your family?

What is the most adventuresome thing you’ve done in the past year?

What is the most spontaneous thing you have ever done?

How important is it to you that your partner fulfill traditional gender roles? Would you like a woman who will cook, shop and keep house? Would you like a man who maintains the cars, manages the finances and is handy around the house?

What do you most like to do on a day off?

What is one thing you could start doing today that would most improve the quality of your life?

When do you feel most afraid?

If you could accomplish only one thing during the rest of your life, what would it be?

Tonight you can do anything you want – no penalties, no reprisals and the cost is unimportant. What are you going to do?

Describe your own personal style.

How would you spend a romantic evening with someone you have been dating for more than one year?

Looking back at your life, describe one particular event that you wish you had handled differently.

What do you think are the three best traits you have to offer a partner?

Does life look good to you right now? Describe your current emotional health.

Tell me about your closest friend. How long have you known him/her, and what do you like best about him/her?

Describe your spirituality.

Describe your parents’ relationship with each other.

What are your general feelings about money and personal wealth?

How would you describe your childhood relationship with your mother and/or father?

What are you looking for in a relationship partner?